Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Day One of Travel; January 26; Courtney

                Noon
                After half a year of preparation we are embarking on a unique chapter in all of our lives. My mother worked in the education system a quarter of a century. My father worked as a pilot for roughly four decades. As for me, well, I’ve never held the same job for more than a year. But, I’m excellent at being a full-time student.
When I was a student, I dreamed of traveling the country in a tour bus. Now, I’m traveling the country with my parents in an RV. I guess you could say I’m the eternal child.
One of my favorite things is to sleep. So, for the first day on the trip that’s what I’m trying to do. The bed in the back of the RV is extremely comfortable, but the constant moving is jarring.
I got used to sleeping in 15 passenger vans during my term in AmeriCorps. The cramped seats, the constantly freezing temperatures (my team consisted of mostly Northerners,) and the constant bickering. That couldn’t have prepared me for living in an RV.
This is a lot more comfortable and inviting. However, the constant shuddering of the engine, the bouncing of the back tires, and the loud echo of the road was not something I had to experience in AmeriCorps.
Panic sinks in when you are laying under your covers, shaking from the rough road. Or when you roll uncontrollably your breath starts to quicken. And it’s hard to convince yourself that this is normal. At least, it’s normal for this decade old, faded RV. The only thing that makes me calm is knowing that this trip is on a hope and a prayer, and that no matter what happens, if you survive this and live well past your parents, then this will be something you cherish.
3:30 p.m.
We explored Mammoth Springs, just south of the Missouri-Arkansas border. The last time I was here was when my mom, Great Aunt Mabel and I were driving up from Texas. We didn’t know it was going to be our last road trip at the time.
When we first arrived it looked familiar to me. But I couldn’t put my finger on why. The spring was very low and the dam was open, so I couldn’t identify it based on its features. When we were walking around the back side of the spring I started thinking that maybe I’d been there with Aunt Mabel but I still wasn’t sure. That is until we reached a bridge where Aunt Mabel and I chased geese. Last time, she and I tried to get as close as we could without scaring them, so that we could take beautiful pictures. Even though it’s winter now, the geese were still there.
6:30 p.m.
One of the things I love most about traveling is the fact new landscapes always remind me of how large and powerful the earth is. We are driving through Northern Arkansas. It has the rolling hills of the Ozarks. You can see pastures traced by woods. Many millennia ago, ice formed these lands. Then, when humans came along the landscape changed again, for our needs. It makes me feel so small. Here I am, one measly human driving across its gorgeous features.
For me travelling has turned into a spiritual endeavor.  While I lay in the back of the van I felt at peace about entering the journey of the American Nomad.  Those blissful moments of knowing you are exactly where you need to be don’t last long. All it takes is a little self-consciousness for the feeling to dissipate.
8:00 p.m.
Of course, when you embark on new journey you wonder if you are making the right decision with your life. I’ve always been insecure with my decision making skills. But, surprisingly, I think it was music that’s helped me really accept that this truly is the right path.
A few days before we left, I was driving back from Chesterfield when my deceased friend’s song came on the radio – 1,000 Miles by Vanessa Carlton. Whenever that song plays it feels like Deonna is around and letting me know that whatever I’m going through is okay.
The song immediately following Deonna’s song was Wake Me Up by Aloe Blacc, which is a song my mother has always dedicated to me. It’s a song about not knowing where you are going in life, youthfulness, and self-identification. It talks a lot about how the life your living is as good as a dream even though you may feel lost.
 The song after that was Follow Your Arrow by Kacey Musgraves, which embraces individuality, which is also the only other song that my mom has dedicated to me recently.
These three songs helped me relax about the trip. It made me feel like whatever was coming would work out in the end.
For the last four years I’ve felt a draw to a handful of songs. Those songs will always hold a special place in my heart. And when they play, it always brightens my day or makes me feel less stressed about my life in general.
Today, we stopped at a gas station in Beebe, Arkansas, for the night. We don’t have water for a few days (we were scared the water would freeze in the tanks in Missouri’s erratic weather,) so I had to go inside to use the restroom.  A song called I Will Wait by Mumford and Sons was playing. This song has been a powerful song for me since 2012.
With these coincidences I’m breathing a little bit easier. Maybe feeling at peace earlier wasn’t a fluke.  
                9:00 p.m.
                This is social experiment. Much life AmeriCorps NCCC - FEMA Corps was. But this will be more interesting. You take a family and stick them into a small RV, and see where things go from there.
                So far it’s going well. My dad and I played Gin Rummy while Mom took a nap in the back room. We bet pennies.  When I left on Saturday tensions were very high during the end of the moving period. I think we’ve entered the Honeymoon period. It’s good. We had Navy Beans for dinner and cooked up some Caribbean Blue Crab claws, which will probably be eaten tomorrow. We figured out how to brush our teeth without running water.
                This living simply thing works for me. I like the small space, the shortage of internet, the lack of television, and the creative thinking that is required for daily routines.  

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